...if it aint one thing its another...

so ii been down && out lately cuz my car been actin up... so I'm like fuck my life is over!! ii can't afford to not have a car it just make things that much harder... ii swear everytime ii turn around it somethin!! uuggghhh!! so I'm goin to have 2 change a few things put a few things on hold all cuz of my car!! its gonna cost 1300 for the part itself && then labor is goin 2 be a bitch 2!! ii think if ii do everythin right tho ii can have the money in two weeks! maybe three!! but fuck ii work hard for my money && it seems like my car eats it up! ii mean wat am ii gonna do for the next couple weeks? catch the bus? ask for rides? use someone's car?? ii am goin 2 have to bite the bullet on some of this shit... ii will catch the bus b4 ii depend on anyone to pick me up all the time!! ii know wat ii got aint 2 good 2 get on the bus however if ii dont have to then ii wouldn't want 2... but ii will say that ii am humbled by this situation because ii've had a car since ii was 18 never been on the bus since && now I'm takin 3 steps back!! uggghh! whatev tho... imma be mia for a while!! my feelings are really hurt right now!!

...summer fling...

ok so like two summers ago ii had a summer fling and it was coo for what it was nothing to serious... we continued to talk for the last two years and now he is comin back and of course ii want to kick it with him but am ii looking for a fling? ii mean the bestest said why waste ur time adding numbers if u cant see a future with that person! like fa real! ii agree but ii am looking to have fun and chill nothin serious but ii am too old to have a "fuck buddy" but he is coo... but hey we will see what happends this summer! im looking forward to it! really ii am!! yay

the short "do"

so ii finally found time in my day that ii can post everyday... lol hopefully it works out this time!!!



so this summer ii decided to try a few short hair styles!! ii want to see how they work out for me... but this is the first of many!! ii guess you can say that this is a start of a new me!! a woman's hair means so much so its important for me to find something that will work out!! enjoy!!

... a bad start 2 my day...

last night ii went 2 bed early... thinkin ii was goin 2 have a great start today... well no it didn't work out that way...

first ii woke up @ 6 this moring && had a sore throat! how random is that?? so ii had my mom drug me up b4 she went 2 work... so ii had a theraful by 7 && was back sleep by 7:30!! so my sister calls me talkin bout she needs me 2 go 2 the bank && make a deposit for her... that was about 11... so ii tell her ii dont feel like goin right now so ii told her I'd go when ii leave for work...

so we stared arguin for no reason then she was worked up then it went to screaming && yellin!!

ii get so mad when people want you 2 jump when they say jump!! or ask how high!! ii will never understand what she is goin through 3,000 miles away && she will never understand what ii am goin through here!! we are on two different sides of the fence && can't find a way 2 meet in the middle!! we havin been doin this four years now && we havent ever argued like this!! ii dont think she understands how hard ii work!! just like ii dont understand how hard she has to work.... but my feeling get really hurt when ii can't do for her! ii work for both of us! money means nothin 2 me... NOTHIN! but thats y ii have fears of bein broke becuase ii know if I'm broke then my sister is 3,000 miles away in the same situation!! && ii won't have that!! so many people have said what they were gonna do for her, && no one did anythin but me... now dont get me wrong she has helped me out 2... she helped me get my first car... ii hate when we fight like this fa real!! but enough of this bad day already!! work sucksss 2day!! ugh ii wanna go home!!

... 101 dislikes...

1. Lien man this is my number 1 dislike... all the rest aren't in order

2. Rude People

3. white girls that wanna be black or call themselves "snowbunnies"

4. people that stare

5. when people leave their clothers in the dryer for hella days

6. stank breath

7. dirty dishes

8. when theirs nothin on tv && ii got hella channels... what the hell am ii payin for?

9. when people assume shit about me

10. loud ass people

11. people who always play the "victim" role

12. dirty nails

13. when people put their feet on me

14. when people cut me off in traffic, to go the same speed as me or slower

15. when people drink && drive

16. when dudes that ii "talk to" ask for money... no nigga you aint gettin nothin

17. when ii get 2 cold that ii can't sleep

18. when people repeat the same song over && over again...

19. high water pants!

20. ignorance

21. multi-colored hair

22. when people lace their shoes so tight that the sides are touchin.. lol

23. when ii get out of my bed && ii step on somethin

24. the smell of cigarettes

25. haters

26. beggin ass people

27. when people drive hella slow in the fast lane

28. window shoppin... y do it, you can't get it && when you do go back its gonna be gone! lol

29. people who can't take a joke

30. when my socks get holes in them @ the top

31. a dirty ass bathroom

32. broke ass people

33. fake people

34. when dudes have sweat stains under their arms

35. pissy drunk people

36. when people who drive nice cars, take up two spaces in a crowded ass lot

37. gossip

38. rumors

39. dudes who can't hold a decent conversation

40. over crowded clubs

41. when people say "shhhh" to me

42. when people grab my feet to wake me up...

43. people that drive crazy in the rain

44. dirty shirts && shoes

45. when people call me "big momma"

46. when AIM be trippin... if you got a sidekick you know exactly what I'm talkin about

47. childern who dont act their age

48. women who justify why their man cheats

49. slow ass waiters && waitresses

50. deordorant stains

51. when people run out of gas... stop bein lazy and get gas... damn

52. when people get irritated becuase I'm irritated

53. girls that can't walk in heals... dont wear them if you cant walk duh

54. people who try 2 hard

55. lames

56. when people park in my spot

57. blocked numbers

58. people that call my phone && say "who's this"

59. when my sister stares @ me hella close 2 my face when I'm tryin 2 go 2 sleep

60. when somethin spills in my purse ugh

61. police who are hella rude just cuz they are police

62. gold diggers

63. when I'm wrong

64. when my mirror gets dirty

65. when people play loud ass music when I'm sleep

66. bannanas

67. people that wear clothes that are too small

68. when people take pictures of their money... wats the point?? if u got money then people will know

69. cheap lip gloss

70. when people send me the same text over && over

71. tomato soup

72. bugs... all types

73. wearing panties

74. when people step on my toes

75. when ii stub my toe

76. non dancin ass people

77. all of my ex's

78. females who blame another female for their man cheatin when they didn't know about her in the first place

79. dirty carpets

80. when people forget 2 flush the toilet!! eeww

81. followers

82. when my battery on my phone dies

83. crowded ass groccery stores

84. people that say "oh ur pretty for a big girl" why can't ii just be pretty damn??

85. when dudes that ii dont know slap my butt

86. lazy people

87. people that talk too much

88. when people got hella beat in their car && all you hear is the lisence plate shaking

89. when gas stations are hella full

90. when people burn eggs... lol

91. when its too hot to breathe outside

92. when people ask for my opinion then get mad

93. when a dude puts his head on my shoulder when we are @ the movies

94. gettin pinched

95. having a flat tire

96. when my cell phone looses service

97. nappy afros

98. chapped lips

99. silk short sleeve shirts

100. this whole "modelin" epidemic

101. when people steal my change... ii collect change it everywhere && ii know when people steal it!

make sure you do your 101 likes && dislikes... my likes are comin soon!! =)

...who really cares...

some days you feel like no one cares... well 2day is that day!! man I'm movin a million miles an hour with gettin things 2gether for my plus size pagent, getting a second job, doin graphics, setting up photo shoots, going to work, tryin 2 find a spot with my girls && tryin 2 sleep!! It seems like when ii am hella tired or dont feel like talkin on the phone or somethin I'm the bad guy!! I'm bein rude or somethin... FUCK!! ii got problems of mine own ii dont got time 2 listen 2 the next man's... ii got tough skin so ii dont complain a lot but damn can ii get a break!! ii dont think people really understand how hard ii really work... like fa real!! ughhh im so ready to scream but ii will scream @ the top of my lungs when ii am successful && rich!! then imma scream @ everyone that didn't understand!! && all the people who was mad cuz ii didn't listen 2 their "man" problems will be alright!! fa real!!

...April Fool's Day...

my my my where do ii start with april fool's day!! yesterday a friend of mine played the worse april fool's joke... he pretended that he had passed away... he and his bestfriend decided to play this trick on people!!! there were pics up on myspace and everything... so when ii was informed of this ii of course believed it because ii didnt think that GROWN ASS ADULTS would play a april fools joke that serious!!! so ii started cryin right away!! ii couldnt help but to cry he is someone that is close enough for me to cry!!! ii was so worried it was crazy!!! ii was scared and nervous!! and to top it all off ii didnt think it was a joke!!! so this morning ii was told that it was a joke and ii was FURIOUS!!! its not that it was a joke its the fact that DEATH was involved!! you dont play with death like that.... callin someone and playin like your a radio host and they have just won some money sum shit like that not DEATH!! does anybody else realize how serious this is... and no ii wont look back on this and think ii over reacted!!! I cant stand that people think this shit was ok or funny haha well im not laughin!!!